Happiness Trumps Positivity, Every Time
Some people say I am a positive person…I disagree.
I am a HAPPY person.
I used to be positive…but was still unhappy, and today in this blog, I want to explain why and how, if you are experiencing the same, it can be different for you too…you CAN be happy.
Many years ago I realised that I was similar to a lot of other people I knew- seemingly happy on the outside but miserable and lost on the inside. I had that ‘fake’ happiness. You know…the smile for the client, for the family, for the friends. Sure, I loved and enjoyed the company of the people in my life and I enjoyed my career, but there was an element to my Being that was not happy. I truly had to force it. And I didn’t like that either!
No one knew.
But there is a darkness in the eyes that I can see in others now, because it reminds me of me. The old me. The me that now has bright eyes- a Light from within. Happiness, not positivity.
Today Id like to share some of the ways that have helped me be truly happy, not just positive, and the tips to keeping your state of happiness no matter what is going on around you.
When I began with positive statements and affirmations on the path to personal development, I found that although they were a way of changing my mindset, the limiting beliefs I held in my subconscious were blocking the ‘positivity’ from making an impact.
I felt I was still in that ‘fakeness’ of happiness. Not the ‘state’ of happiness.
What needed to happen was to be in awareness of the emotions I was feelings. Rather than ignore, hide or suppress what I was feeling- feel it. Then ask: Where is this coming from? Why am I feeling this right now?
The big key here though is to let go of any blame or resentments and take full responsibility for what you feel.
It’s a tough ask in the beginning and often challenging to get past BUT if you can lay aside blame, and ask yourself what is bringing these feelings up for YOU, then you can acknowledge it and it will dissipate.
Holding on to feelings will keep them hanging around. Now, if they are great feeling then that’s a bonus! If they are dragging you down, they need to be let go of.
Self enquiry has been the toughest thing, and the most effective thing I have done in personal development.
Making a choice in every moment to be happy. That truly is what it is about. Not Being positive and fighting against the limiting beliefs that may still be hiding in your subconscious. Self enquiry brings them out of hiding, ready to be healed.
So, my advice here is to do the work on yourself, find the tools and teachers that will help you heal and find that inner peace and happiness you deserve. True inner happiness. Not surface positivity.
The next tip I want to give you here is about how to maintain your happiness during the day when so many things around you may serve in the negative way and bring you down.
Once again, it is vital that we feel our feelings and emotions when they arise, but to stay in them for too long may cause the rest of the day to simply just go downhill…and fast!
Here is what I do to maintain my happy state no matter what.
- I feel what I am feeling- always. Sometimes that means I cry, or am angry, or am hurt. My inner happiness is not affected for long.
- I self enquire. Finding out why I may be feeling this way (without blame!) helps to dissolve it.
- I make a choice then and there about how I choose to feel in that moment. DO I want to react? Or do I want to remain in a state of inner happiness?
- I place my hand over the heart at least 5-6 times during the day, or more if I need to depending on the energy around me, and say “I Love, I Love, I Love…Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou” This will place you back in Love and gratitude where you are more empowered to make a choice of how you are feeling.
We are all evolving, growing and learning and one more thing that I now do, and that I totally recommend you to work on too is:
We all make mistakes and we are not perfect, but forgiveness of self and others clears the way, the shame and the guilt so that we can truly feel more and more happiness from deep within us. True inner happiness.
Begin today. Light up the world with your smile, your energy, your vibrance.
How are you currently holding your state of happiness? Or are you like I was a few years ago- being as positive as you can but really in yourself, feeling not so happy?
Comment below and lets share and help each other to all shine our beautiful light and Love.
ps. I wrote a fabulous ebook on Happiness that I would love to gift you!
“How To Use Your Own Inner Guidance To Transform Your Life”
Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will send the link to you xo